He loves me; He loves me not

Written by: Cindy Morrone

If we take just a minute and quiet all the distractions around us, I know we could all come up with moments of sacredness.

Those occasions that are even better than a hallmark movie.

Those times when we realize there is something beyond ourselves.

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Corinthians 4:18

A baby being born. An unexplainable recovery from a dire illness. Freedom from addiction. The return of your prodigal child. A narrow escape from an accident. Provision when the numbers don’t add up. Knowing a love so profound it’s not humanly possible.

I remember a time when one of our daughters was younger and very ill. We had been up all night with her.

It seemed that she was doing better through the night but as soon as my husband left for work in the early morning, her congestion became so much worse and her breathing became labored. I started to panic.

We had earlier called for professional help and they recommended that if her congestion became any worse to bring her into the bathroom with closed doors and run a warm shower.

Taking the medical advice, I brought her into the bathroom and did as recommended.

As the warm vapour enveloped us, my thoughts ran wild. Sitting with her in my arms, feeling her every breath, I willed her breathing to regulate. I prayed desperately.

In that moment, I couldn’t imagine loving her more. I was overcome by my love for her.

And in that moment God spoke to me,……..me! He didn’t speak to me in an audible voice but it was an impression; a thought that didn’t come from me.

As much as you love your daughter, I love you more. For me, this was a sacred moment. I caught a glimpse of God’s love for us; it’s unimaginable; incomprehensible.

Writing a Father’s Day post is most difficult for me. I know this is for many reasons but the crucial reason is because I truly don’t ‘get’ how much God loves me; me.

My notion of how much He loves me is tainted by earthly experiences of being loved and giving love as sin-filled others. A broken promise, hurtful words, selfish motives, unmet expectations to name a few.

On this Father’s Day beloved, may we know with ever increasing realization God’s love for us. May this knowing envelope us and breathe new life into all our areas affected by fatherhood.

Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close Psalm 27:10 New Living Translation

I Will Not Be Overwhelmed

Written by: Cindy Morrone

They say it can take brief seconds before someone begins to drown. Water is swallowed and the larynx goes into spasm and with not enough oxygen in the bloodstream, the last breath is taken.

Life circumstances can feel like that.

And as we try to tread water in the everyday, we stay close to the shore, never thinking to venture into the deep and vast Ocean.

Whenever I share with someone that we foster, almost every. single. time. the response is something similar to, “I could never do that!” “I could never let them go.” “I don’t know how you do it.”

Let me set the record straight. I am not super human. I do not have a super power that helps us to let our precious ones go without it hurting deeply. Neither do I hold back. I don’t hold back my love for them; only giving them 50% so it won’t hurt so much when they leave for their forever home. Nor do my husband or our two incredible daughters. We love 100%.

Simply, we have responded to the Lord’s calling on our family’s life and trudge everyday into a vast unknown.

Undoubtedly, and amazingly, WE have been blessed (and all this overused word implies) way more than we are a blessing.

I question it too. Don’t get me wrong.

When the time comes for this beautiful one to leave us, I wonder if I am going to make it? If we as a family will sink? If we’ll ever do it again?

A Truth has recently been revealed to me, if God has called me to do this, He will not let me be overwhelmed.

He did not ask us to consider this so we would fail; be overcome or devastated.

So when grief tries to sink me, I feel it. I talk about it. I cover it in prayer and ask others to pray for us. I go to His holy Word and His Scriptures of comfort and His love for me. And I grasp, with white knuckles onto my Life Preserver.

What is your Ocean?

Consider the lie that has anchored you to shore.

Consider that it’s possible for YOU to walk on water; holding Jesus’ hand. Living life abundantly!

“Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him, “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” Matthew 14: 29-31

Glimpses of Brokenness

Written by: Cindy Morrone

I have forgiven. It wasn’t that hard. I was so blinded by anticipated marital bliss that her comments didn’t offend me.

I haven’t forgotten.

Picking up a few things at the grocery store where my fiancé worked as a teenager, he was catching up with the lady working the cash register. Her beehive hairstyle and dangly earrings gave away her years. The conversation started light and positive as they exchanged the happenings of the times in between.

It was when he introduced her and I and the exciting news that we were about to get married that the conversation turned. The words that then flew out of her mouth couldn’t be stopped. For a moment we couldn’t respond. We couldn’t answer why we would do such a foolish thing and ruin our lives.

“But the things that come out of a person’s mouth come from the heart, and these define them. For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.” Mathew 15:18 & 19

I’ve remembered her reaction.

Now after 22 years as husband and wife, we know full well the hurt and pain that can happen in a marriage. How momentous the fight is to love deeper.

And I am so sorry I didn’t respond better to her. She had given us a glimpse of her brokenness. She was speaking from her shattered heart.

Our response at that time spoke of our own hearts’ condition. Selfish and self-absorbed. Judgmental.
How many times have I been given a glimpse of brokenness and instead of helping to pick up the shattered pieces, I’ve left them in ruins?

“For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.” “Then the righteous will answer him, “’Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ Matthew 25:35-40

Emoji Me

Written by: Cindy Morrone

I have a question for you. When you text, comment or email what do you use most? Words (yes, abbreviated words included) or those great emojis?

I find that whatever I am trying to say can be best said with a smiling face, a face with tears of laughter, a sobbing face, a heart, praying hands or a monkey (when all else fails).

It just seems easier. And I am realizing there is something more to this than my cumbersome thumbs and thoughts not getting the words right.

I cry often. I cry at parades, most movies, talking to my daughters’ teacher (just last month, yes, they are in high school—grade 9), reading a touching post, watching the firsts of my foster babies and so much more.

I am starting to realize how emotional I can be. I ‘feel’ deeply.

In many ways, I am thankful for this gift. Compassion and empathy bodes serving others.

There are times though when my emotions have wreaked havoc on many situations and circumstances. My emotions have tainted my perceptions and misguided my decisions. How I feel cannot override who I know God to be and my obedience to Him and His holy Word.

In the desert the Israelites became caught up in an emotional frenzy of fear. They were forgetting what they knew about God and His character.

‘That night all the members of the community raised their voices and wept aloud. All the Israelites grumbled against Moses and Aaron, and the whole assembly said to them, “If only we had died in Egypt! Or in this wilderness! Why is the LORD bringing us to this land only to let us fall by the sword? Our wives and children will be taken as plunder. Wouldn’t it be better for us to go back to Egypt?” And they said to each other, “We should choose a leader and go back to Egypt.”’ (Numbers 14:1-4)

Gone were the memories of God freeing them from slavery, protecting them, feeding them and fulfilling every promise made to them. Their perspective changed as it was being led by emotion and being led away from God’s Promised Land.

Living life abundantly, the life God wants for me, means keeping my emotions in check. And letting the Truth about my God direct me by the leading of the Spirit instead.

‘For the Spirit of God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.’ 2 Timothy 1:7

You May Be The Only One…Never Give Up

Written by: Cindy Morrone

“For I am the LORD your God, Who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, Do not fear;
I will help you.”
Isaiah 41:13

We, us Mamas, let’s vow to never give up.

To the Mama who:

* pushed for the last time after too many hours of labour only to watch her precious one be whisked away not knowing if she’ll survive.
* longed to hold her preemie in the NICU isolette attached to too many lines and tubes.
* held her head in her hands while complete exhaustion swept over her amongst the arguing, and bickering that just doesn’t seem to stop some days.
* fosters and is preparing to let another out of her arms and into his forever family.
* now on her own does everything; provides, cooks, cleans, drives, cuddles, cuts the grass, shovels the sidewalk, walks the dog, helps with homework, reads bedtime stories,…
* watches as a derogatory picture of her beautiful daughter spreads all over social media and sees how her beauty is now tainted.
* has stayed up all night wondering where her son is, only to wake up to pounding doors and greeted by police officers.
* has sat beside her worn child with red, sullen eyes wild with drug induced alterations watching him fall out of her reach.
* sees the hopelessness in her precious ones countenance and wonders if the next time he tries, he will succeed in ending his life.
* comes alongside her daughter and provides a home for her and her grandchildren
raises her grandchild as her own.
* has lost her heart’s desire to heaven.

Never give up. Let’s vow to never give up. Let’s do all we can to fight with and for them.

We may be the only ones fighting for our precious ones; but let’s fight; long, hard and with all we have. Sacrificially.

Let’s not hide in our shame, guilt, worry, business and blame. These only work against us and more importantly them.

It’s true we don’t have what it takes, we never did. And this is exactly what it’s not about. But There is something beyond us that offers hope.

I have seen it with my own eyes my friends. I have experienced it myself. Beautiful Mamas that have reached beyond their own abilities in these exact situations and held onto the hand of their Almighty.

They have dropped to their knees and prayed feverishly and unceasing.

They have cried out to their Maker time and time and time again with tear stricken faces.

They have believed in His promises and the Truths in the Word.

They have tribed together in prayer and supplication with others in trusting confidence; bearing each other’s burdens.

No matter the outcome, let’s vow to never give up and with Jesus fight hard for our precious ones.

For it’s an honour and a privilege to be a Mama!!

Happy Mother’s Day Beautiful Warrior Mama!!

Wailing While We Wait

Written by: Cindy Morrone

I watched as the baby wailed for his bottle. He needed for his hunger to cease and his instinct kicked in for his survival.

He became more impatient with every passing second and his wailing intensified. Louder and louder, he cried.

In his infancy, he didn’t realize that only inches away from him was the filled prepared bottle just being warmed to a pleasurable temperature. The formula sat with the exact nutrients needed for his growth and health.

How often do I wail in the wait? So often my friends; too often.

There is a need, a hunger, a hurt and as I wait in my infancy, I don’t trust that God already has prepared for me exactly what is best for me.

God’s Word to His people in the Bible still applies to us today; ‘This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.Isaiah 30:15

Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; therefore he will rise up to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!Isaiah 30:18

I am a beloved daughter of the most high King and He overwhelmingly and overflowing and abundantly fills my every need; every time.

Sisterhood Sunday Featuring Connie Hubert

Presented by: Cindy Morrone

Happy Sunday!! So glad you could join us for Sisterhood Sundays our Abundant Life video series!! We are pleased to have Connie Hubert share with us the hope of restoration despite difficult situations. She wants us to know that God did take care of her and is praying that we know that God will take care of us! Please feel free to share this video.

The Rain Will Come

Written by: Cindy Morrone

The bachelor worked tirelessly to build a home for his future mate and family. Back and forth he flew with straw, dry grass and twigs in his narrow and sharp bill. He would even put in ornaments, like flowers and fresh greens, so she couldn’t refuse his offer.

Admiring how his iridescent plumage was glossed with purple and green when the sun caught his back, something else caught the eye. Looking up, it was also seen that he chose to build his nest inside the roof drain of a very, large building.

Little did he realize that his home, the one he now worked so tirelessly building, was downstream from a storm drain.
Despite his bird’s eye view, he didn’t realize the danger he would be in when the rain came. Collecting from the massive roof top, his enterprise would be all washed away.

The rain comes in our lives too. It’s inevitable. Waves of torment, tsunami diagnoses, drowning relationships and pouring out worries.

How are we to be sure we will survive when they come?

Jesus shares with us the truth as recorded in Mathew 7: 24- 27. “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.” Matthew 7: 24-25

Not only hear the Word of God but live it. Live life abundantly, despite the rain!

  • Walk in faith
  • Forgive
  • Not worry or be anxious
  • Take care of widows, orphans, the poor and needy

The alternative? Is like the end result for this common starling.

“But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.” Matthew 7:26 & 27

Your Journey Matters

Written by: Cindy Morrone

A letter from a Mother to her anticipated child written in her sacred diary, “We wait for you. Your father is excited for you. He waits for you to share with you all that he knows. Please know that we both will give you our all—enough to always be there for you and enough so that you may learn to ‘fly’ in the direction that you, with God’s help, have determined. Please forgive us for our mistakes and have patience as we have so much yet to learn. Beyond all this we will love you for eternity.

It didn’t happen as this expectant Mother anticipated. It would take years for this barren woman to become a Mama.

We wish it didn’t have to be so. We long to sail through life unscathed. And not experience any bumps or falls along the way. No hurts. No losses. No wounds.

And yet, once on the other side of such experiences, we realize we have gained things that can not otherwise be had. These being so valuable, that we can’t help but share with others.

I love this definition of compassion I found on the web at Dictionary.com “a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.“

And although we will never know what someone else is exactly going through; we are all so different, because of our experiences, we can relate and offer to come alongside another as we understand the hurt and pain.

Had I not experienced addiction in my family I couldn’t relate to others who have experienced similar childhoods.
If I wasn’t barren, maybe I wouldn’t have considered adoption or fostering.

Now with my daughters navigating the waters of teenage years, I am tapping into the wealth of my friend resources that have been through similar circumstances and I am gleaning from their experiences.

Our journeys can matter if we let them teach us compassion.

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.” Colossians 3:12-14


Written by: Cindy Morrone

I lay awake many nights, willing my restless mind to meet my exhausted body. Like a bad movie played before my conscious is the mistakes of the day. Over and over again are the reels of hurtful things thought, said and acted out. The clock constantly changes minutes and hours but the lack of peace remains unaltered.

We have a new found phrase in our family. It was birthed out of necessity; survival even. I just said it out loud one day as I was trying to receive what was being said to me despite my extreme offense which was beginning to be the norm in our house rather than the exception.

My poor teenage daughters are in the midst of learning how to express their unbridled feelings and untamed emotions in a big world of uncertainties. After witnessing their profound learning curve, I realized this was not defiance but actually needed mercy filled opportunities.

So, in our home, once a harsh, sassy, or rude comment is said to another, I use, “Re-Do?” This response triggers a chance to reword what was originally spoken and if corrected there follows no consequence.

I wake up many mornings reciting this Scripture, “Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22 & 23

Every single morning He has new compassions for me…..

Mercy that overwhelms my biggest mistakes, and worst decisions….

Because of God’s great love for me….

I have a chance; a second chance to be free to live my life abundantly!

I am so thankful for second chances!!