Sitting on our front porch watching the vehicle leave with our precious one to bring her to her forever home, I watched as my daughters cried. We had spent over 9 months loving and helping to care for her. No longer with us, she will be forever in our hearts.
My heart desperately ached for answers to many questions; one being, “Is this ok for our daughters?”
Was it ok to expose them to such heartache and hurt? Was it ok to expect them to love on and care for another that was known to be with us for only a time?
My husband and I parent our daughters closely. We are hands on kinda parents and consider their safety of the upmost importance. We even strive to come alongside them and as best we can help them navigate through the tribulations they experience. We pray over them and ask others to pray for them. We seek wise counsel when needed.
And yet, here we are a foster family. We have intentionally asked them to love and let go even though it hurts desperately.
As we sat on the porch comforting one another my husband spoke up. He said, “Yes, it hurts so much right now but what if we had never met her? What if we had never had the opportunity to have her in our lives, help care for her and know her? We would have missed out on so much.”
When he spoke, in the very back recesses of my mind, I found the words, “Tis’ better to have loved and lost; Than never to have loved at all.”
Not remembering how I knew these words, I started to research, finding that these words were written by the British poet, Alfred, Lord Tennyson in his poem, “In Memoriam A.H.H.” Lord Tennyson penned these words as he grieved over the loss of a beloved friend.
And I couldn’t agree with him more!!
It is better to have loved and lost her, than to have never loved her at all!! It’s better for me, my husband and our daughters. Our lives are beyond enriched!!
Love comes at a cost. If you’ve loved only for a quick second for all the wrong reasons; you’d have to agree. Love comes at a cost.
But what we’d miss if we don’t open ourselves up to loving and caring for others. What we’d miss if we only consider the cost.
Please, don’t just take my word for it. Open the Bible and see the ultimate love exchange when God did not spare His One and only Son.
Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.” Matthew 16:24 & 25