I have forgiven. It wasn’t that hard. I was so blinded by anticipated marital bliss that her comments didn’t offend me.
I haven’t forgotten.
Picking up a few things at the grocery store where my fiancé worked as a teenager, he was catching up with the lady working the cash register. Her beehive hairstyle and dangly earrings gave away her years. The conversation started light and positive as they exchanged the happenings of the times in between.
It was when he introduced her and I and the exciting news that we were about to get married that the conversation turned. The words that then flew out of her mouth couldn’t be stopped. For a moment we couldn’t respond. We couldn’t answer why we would do such a foolish thing and ruin our lives.
“But the things that come out of a person’s mouth come from the heart, and these define them. For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.” Mathew 15:18 & 19
I’ve remembered her reaction.
Now after 22 years as husband and wife, we know full well the hurt and pain that can happen in a marriage. How momentous the fight is to love deeper.
And I am so sorry I didn’t respond better to her. She had given us a glimpse of her brokenness. She was speaking from her shattered heart.
Our response at that time spoke of our own hearts’ condition. Selfish and self-absorbed. Judgmental.
How many times have I been given a glimpse of brokenness and instead of helping to pick up the shattered pieces, I’ve left them in ruins?
“For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.” “Then the righteous will answer him, “’Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ Matthew 25:35-40