Without Rival—Week Four, Post Three

Written by: Melissa Lefevers

We continue along in our study and discussion of chapters 7 & 8 of Without Rival by Lisa Bevere

Have you ever been scared?

I am scared of birds. Yes, I realize this is irrational but I am. Anything bigger than a sparrow and I am petrified. My kids are fearful of the dark and my husband of spiders. I know people who are scared of all kinds of things. Fear is real and sometimes it causes us to miss out on things.

Often, we miss out on love because of fear. Not just the sort of love that we share with our spouse but even the love we can have with friends, and with God.

I googled the definition of fear and here is what I found.

fear -an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

With seeing the actual definition in words it makes me wonder why we view people as threats? I am pretty sure we all fear loving others, God and our spouses because of past pain.

Maybe we have at one time been used, abused, or taken advantage of. Maybe we have been left, abandoned, and shut out. Maybe we have been hurt so bad we don’t know if we want to trust again. Maybe that is you, maybe at one time it was me, but it doesn’t have to be.

As I sat and read Lysa Bever’s “Without Rival” and I came across a chapter on Fear and Love. I was struck by her words on page 161 in Chapter 7 “The opposite of fear is not faith or even courage it’s love.” I sat and thought. Thought about all the times I pushed people away. All the times I pushed my husband away. All the times I didn’t want to let people in because I was scared they would hurt me.

Then I thought about all that I could have missed because I chose fear instead of love. All the relationships that would have been deeper. The moments with my husband I would treasure forever and then I remember what changed me.

I remember the day I realized that God truly loves me and no matter what he will always be with me. If God can love me so intently that he gave his Son for me then I could risk loving others the same. We do not have to fear loving others because God loves us and He is love. He will give us the courage to love others the way he loves us. We do not have to be afraid.

“ I have loved you with and everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness.” Jeremiah 31:3

God loves us with an everlasting love and with the kindness of his love he has drawn you in and near to his heart. That love can and will sustain you. That love can and will cast out all fear. You can love because God is love. Don’t be afraid anymore, God loves you deeply.

Please choose one of the questions from our conversation cafe and answer it in the comment section below.


Conversation Cafe:

  1. Do you find yourself scared to love others because you don’t want to get hurt?
  2. Have you made the decision to love anyway because God is love?